Best Question ever, please help me, long distance relationship advice?

We have been together now 2 years and she is going to LA, she signed with a talent agency for movies and singing. I live in Cleveland, Ohio. That is 2800 miles away from each other, we love each other and talk about family and marrige alot, but we just arn't ready for that yet. She says that she can't have me out there bc she needs top be able to do this acting/singing thing on her own, and she wants to know that she can do it by herself, she doesn't want me there to be able to bail her out if she is on a jam, she just needs to know she can make it on her own. She wants to stay together, here are her exact words ';I know it would be fun and great to have you out here with me but I need to find myself and what I really want out of this life, and it kinda makes me sad that if you come with me, I will never know if I could have done it, I love you and whatever is meant to happen will happen. Everything will be ok. I will love you forever.'; Help me please, what this means, adviceBest Question ever, please help me, long distance relationship advice?
Baby..this relationship is not likely to last. This is coming from someone who has had a long-distance relationship. I was in America and my now husband was in Europe. We had different outlook on things though. We wanted each other and couldn't wait to be together! But she sounds like she 'needs to find herself' so she will probably find other relationships. Sorry! But if a couple really love each other they want to be together. They wouldn't say things like she's said to you.


';whatever is meant to happen will happen'; is a very OPEN suggestion..which MEANS she has no problem finding someone else! This gal isn't worth your time. You sound like you're serious about the relationship since you're willing to go out with her. She's definitely NOT serious about it at all. She wants to have fun without YOU. And she said it makes her 'sad' to think if you go out with her??? Geez.. She sounds too young to be in a serious relationship. I would've loved if my boyfriend/fiance was able to come out with me. If I were you I would keep your options open too (and make sure you tell her this as well! *whatever is meant to happen will happen!*) and if another lady or ladies come along that are nice and sweet to you should date them instead.Best Question ever, please help me, long distance relationship advice?
im guessing that it means that w/e desiscion you choose, either to be w/her or not..then she doesnt mind. But if you two love each other alot%26amp;regardless..then I am sure that you two can make it over this. You never know,this can be as an obstacle to see if you two can go on w/out each other for a while. I hope this helped you. And if not,sorry for wasting your time. Hope all is well,and w/e you decide,i hope the best!
marry her
gosh, if u love her not sure u will listen to anyone.. but you need to let her go.. as hard as that is.. tell her u just want to be friends, the long-d thing just isn't gonna work for ya.. you will always wonder what is going on, you will have doubt, this way you can date, and if it was meant to be .. whenever,, then it will be... those words she said to you sound good.. but I think you need to read between the lines... If someone loves you as much as you love them... they want you near at all times, to support them, love them, hold them whatever the situation might me... good luck...
first of all, a long distance relationship is the equilvlant to having a magical non existent friend. you are being faithful to someone you can't sleep with, you are talking to someone who isn't there. 50% of a relationship is physical. don't let a woman tell you otherwise. if you can't be physical, you can't have a functional relationship
Choice A) she's a resiliently willed woman who feels she needs to build her strength in independance to fulfil her dream.


choice B) She wants her cake and eat it too...hollywood is her plan a...and you're the plan b


choice C) She wants the full expierence of LA and bringing you will only keep her from shedding her old self


Choice D)...she's fu-#$# gone crazy and she doesn't know wtf is up with her life


like most people who go to LA to be an actor...i go with D
Sorry. I think the whole I need to find myself thing is her way of telling you that if she finds something better out there or someone who can further her ';career'; she is going to go for it.
here let me change this to what she really means:





';I think your great and all, but f*** you im movin to LA. Do you know how many famous people are there? If i become famous i'll be able to date almost anyone i choose!. Why would i wanna be hanging out with a loser like you when i ccould be hanging out with people like ___________(insert her favorite famous person name in the blank)!';





so i could be wrong. but if i chose those words. thats what i would mean by it





((o and i disagree with ur_hacked03. if a relationship cant make it without being physical, how do you explain military wives who wait for a year or more waiting for their hubby to come home!?!?! it can work without physical!!!)
What this means is: I want to go to California and live a fabulous, glamorous life. I want to try to make it big and become famous and live the good life--on my own (without you). But if it doesn't work out, I want you to be waiting for me in Cleveland.





Sorry, my friend. Sounds like she's looking for something else, but wants to keep you around ';just in case';! :(
My only concern is, why can't she ';do it'; with you there? You don't necessarily have to bail her out....just BE THERE. How can that hold her back from ';doing her thing';. Wouldn't it be nice for the two of you to experience this together. At what point does she plan on calling you to come out to LA?
Just let her go if that's what she is saying to you. YOu can't change her mind if that's how she feels. Maybe if you act like, well, okay, good luck with everything- she might change her mind. Sometimes you gotta just let go.





If you love something, set it free. If it is meant to be, it will come back to you.
It means ... let her go. No strings attached. She's wanting her independence, needing it and should anything go wrong you can't be blamed for any of it. She is free to include you in her life again, if that's what you want. If it all goes smashingly well for her then she can either take all the credit for it herself, or maybe even crediting you with letting her go so well and come back to you for it. If that's what you want. It's not easy to do, but better for you in the long run. And wish her well.
Let her go fulfil her dreams herself..This shows that she wants to be independent and if you were to go with her, she might just have the feeling of being dependent on you, looking for you whenever she has her downs. She wants to tell herself that she can be independent in doing what she wants to do. She can pick herself up whenever she's down, even when you're not with her.


Maintaing a long distance relationship is never easy. It takes responsibility and self-discipline from both parties. She may also wants to test the stability of your relationship, the trust etc.. You would feel insecure, worried about her and she would feel the same for you.. As her bf, what you can do is to encourage her, tell her that both of you would be fine and you have faith in her..Let her fulfill her dreams with a peaceful mind that she is not letting you down or some sort..


But in the midst of pursuing her dreams, time would be a killer.She may not have time for you, unable to communicate as much and you would have to be understanding towards that. Good luck pal!
She does love you for shure, however she wants to make sure she can do it in her own. Hmm, Your a great guy, just to let her go on her own, but what will happen if she meets someone new out there?? You guys are too far away.. And there is an old saying that relationships from long distance never work out.. Eventually your love for one another will fade with time.. What if you meet someone else, or what if she meets someone else, you don't know when she will be back, too many things can happen, between now and when she comes back, which you don't exactly know.. I know you love her, but will how much are you willing to wait for her?? Will you wait for her for 1 year? How about 4 or 5 years?? Will you wait for her still, or will you eventually move on? Just think about it.. I wish you lots of luck... i would feel lucky, and blessed if a person who I really loved would be willing to go and be there with me, specially if I need him, at least just a shoulder to leanon %26amp; for him to tell me that I will make it, to cheer me up when I am at my lowest, and to be there with me to celebrate the good times.. She was indeed allicky girl, why is she leaving you.. I have no ideah why would a person do this to such a good guy.. I hope you can prove me wrong.. Have a good night.. :}Ciao*
sounds like she dosent want to hurt you so she is letting you off easy
I've carried on an EXTREMELY close long distance relationship for the past 9 YEARS!!!!!!! it works because the two of us TRULY care for one another and NEED one another---it's just neither of us CAN be in the same place for now.... maybe when he retires in 2 years.... but, if two people really love one another they can withstand the test of time....she may get out there and realize she can MAKE it on her own but misses the bejesus out of you--or, she may allow the relationship to become less and less important to her... it's a coin toss as to which way it will go----you COULD ask her to marry you but she already told you she wants to try to make it on her own for a while....no woman EVER really wants to become DEPENDENT on a man for her life.....give her this time---IF it is meant to be---like she said, IT WILL BE---and if not, isn't it best to find that out NOW while you are still young enough to start over again???? (IF YOU HAVE TO)?





I suggest you let her go---give her a few weeks to REALLY MISS YOU and then maybe stop out there for a weekend to surprise her....if she is REALLY happy then to see you----you know it will be OK---if she has a fit, go home and realize you gave it your best effort....
You are in trouble. With a capitol T and rhymes with P and that stands for Putz.





She wants to find herself but wants you as an anchor to fall back on. Not good. Tell her that. A relationship is a two way street. Singing and Dancing in LA? What? Pole dancing per chance?





Pull yourself together man. Get a ticket to LA and just show up. See for yourself. If she is in trouble... bail here out. If she does just want to find herself then more power to her but a relationship is two ways not just her way.