Long distance relationship advice!! I don't think I can cope!?

Ok, I'm 16 years old and I live in Aberdeen.


My mum lives in Dorset and I visit her every holiday.


Thats my situation except things are alot more complicated now.





During summer I met a girl in Dorset and fell head over heels in love with her....I couldn't stay away from her for even minutes of the day and I thought it was difficult when she went home every night. She flet the same way about me and after a week we were in a relationship. We are very honest with each other and we talk openly about everything. I truly love her more than anyone and I've never felt this way about a person in my life (although I'm only 16). When I had to leave for Aberdeen I was gutted. I sat in my room for 2 weeks untill school started and I didn't even look outside for most of it. My dad was seriously worried about me. School has started and what I'm most woried about is that I'm doing my Highers this year (equivalent to A levels) and I can't concentrate at all. She is the only person I can think of and I can tell that my grades are slipping. My social life has gone out the window because all I do is speak to her on skype. From 6-9 every night. Don't get me wrong I love it so much. I'm just wondering if that's the problem. My grades and Social life are being destroyed and I can't seem to care. All I do is make time for her, willingly and longingly. I have another 2 years of sitting in Aberdeen before I can move down close to her but I'm scared that after all that I might not be able to. I just need someone to tell me how I should go about handling this. Please


Thank you for reading through this.Long distance relationship advice!! I don't think I can cope!?
Long distance relationships DO work so ignore the people who say they dont. I'm in one and MOST of my friends have been in them, all very successfully.





Anyways... my advice to you is to try to start enjoying your own life and not be SO dependant on her, its fun to know you're there for each other and you actually have things to talk about... if you start failing your exams and dont do anything with your spare time it will cause problems in the relationship. People are attracted to people who have their independance and seperate interests, it keeps a rship healthy.





Maybe make plans to meet up sometime soon and until then you can look forward to it whilst still living yoyr own life, you'll still be there for each other but it will be a lot more balanced and healthy :)





Me and my bf do our own thing totally in the week n when we meet up we have so much to talk about and really appreciate our time together then :)





good luck!Long distance relationship advice!! I don't think I can cope!?
I live in dorset =D





but theres not really much advice people on here can give you other than tell you that you are in love =/.








p.s to the tardo who said ';your 16 you have no idea what love is'; - are you freakin retarded or just jealous?
Long distance relationships do not work. Especially with a two year gap. Before you know it you will only be talking to her less than an hour. You will start to worry if she has someone else and fights will start. They just dont work.
Tell her *** to get on webcam and beg for secks, it's not like you'll progress otherwise. If she says no, you can leave her!


Problem solved. The webcam secks will make you cope.
*roll eyes*


omg. just tell your dad you need to visit your girlfriend once a week. you're old enough to have one, aren't you. just promise you'll hike your grades up so he'll agree to let you visit her.
You can email me if you need continuous advice. I have some experience in (failed) long distance relationships.
Long distance relationships don't work. Period.





And then some.
Long distance relationships dont work. Period.
Aww that sucks :(





I live in UK and my boyf lives in Puerto Rico and we can only talk at certain times. But hold in there, pal x
There is a fine line between love and obsession. You are the answer to the problem. Make yourself get out. Get some counseling if need be
you're 16, you have no idea what love is. you should forget about her
Long distance relationships do work! I'm like that im in a relationship further than that think cornwall - scotland :/, But what i think you should do i move down and live with your mum, if i could i would move up to my boyfriend but obviously i cant go out there on my own :P Move down, live with your mum, go to school with your girlfriend it all equals that everyone is happy your mum is closer to you, your with your girlfriend and in the holidays you should go visit your dad and take your girlfriend :) hope i helped GL
My grandma told my Dad when he was young, 'A girl in another town's no girl at all.'





I know you don't want to hear this, but forget about her for the time being. Concentrate on your studies; it's your future that you need to think about. If you wish, you can e-mail, phone etc - but seriously limit this time. You cannot base your whole life around this girl when you're so young. When you have got your qualifications, and been to University (if that's what you want to do) and have got a decent job and income, then that's the time to be thinking about a serious relationship.


You may both find that, contrary to absence making the heart grow fonder, you actually drift apart and one or other of you meet someone else anyway!
Can you move in with your Mom? Is that an option for you? Talk to your Dad about how you feel. Does he know how you are feeling? He just might understand and want the best for you. Maybe you can finish your schooling from your moms. Your grades may pick up too. I hope you find the answers you need. Cheers! Don't worry, be happy.
ignore the idiot that said long distance relationships dont work. i live in leeds and my boyfriend lives in carlisle and after 3 years of being together i am moving up there in a few months. i think you still need to make time for your friends though your life cant revolve around her - what happens if it doesn`t work out you will have lost all your friends and you`ll have no one. if she loves you she`ll understand you cant devote all your free time to talking to her you need to concentrate on college too.
some say girls aren't worth it. some say love is worth everything. its hard to decide between the two because you know you are emotional and not thinking straight. Some people get so vacant from responsibilities and social lives that they get sick. You should make a decsion to be together or to have each other but not all the time. You have to think of her well being too! you are asking for her to have no social life and possibly shirk her responsibilities... as much as you say you love her if that is true you want her to be as well rounded and stable as possible. encourage social activities and long distance... its the only way to make it through.
If she means so much to you, then I wont say you should break it off, although most long distance relationships end in heartache. What I can suggest is doing some time management and let her know that you have other responsibilities to take care of. You may have to take a night or two off so you can catch up on your studying... and this takes some self discipline (I've been there), but it's worth it in the end.
Your 'problem', which I adore, is that you cannot spend time without her or apart from her.





This is great if she feels the same way and, if you're to do well in your studies, you need the feeling of security that she's not going to elope with someone else.





You might want to find times in which you can be with her in person, ie. take a train or travel down to her, spend weekends with her, spend the holidays with her.





Skype just wont be enough to satisfy your desire to be with her so you can concentrate on your studies.





Really, for you to be able to do well in your Highers, you're going to need to take your mind off of her when you're working. There is no easy way to do this when you're such a distance from her. It's extremely difficult as this is a person you genuinely care about, almost to the point of obsession.





This is never a bad thing if the other person feels the same way, but definitely, moving away from her was not a good choice.





The best, and most sensible, way of handling this is to get over her. If you want to focus on your studies, you'll need to do this at some point and it's better done now, than later.





You'll save yourself a whole world of hurt if you choose to get over her now, rather than when she elopes with someone else or loses interest in you.





Save yourself loads of pain by suffering a bit now. It's the noble thing to do and will make your life, and her life, more fruitful in the future.





Who knows, you might get together again after some years and your relationship will be stronger than it ever has been in the past.
My personal experience with long distance relationships is that everything fades. The only problem is the lack of the physical component that is so important in a relationship makes up such a huge part of a serious relationship.





And I am not much older than you (18) but I must give you a reality check: this probably won't last. At this stage in your life, you are too young to be sharing yourself with someone else... you need to focus on building yourself up and developing yourself, because at this stage in our lives we both have a lot of growing up to do and experiences to have.


Long story short, don't sacrifice your grades and your social life for something that could be fleeting. This is a really important stage in your life, and every day is an opportunity to make a solid foundation for yourself.





I'm not saying that your relationship is doomed, or to break up or anything like that. Just sort out your priorities, and I can't stress this enough: DON'T LOSE YOURSELF.