In need of some advice, Online/Long distance Relationship?

Okay well the past few years I've been playing this online game. I met this girl on that game in January 2008 or thereabouts. I wasn't looking for love by any means but I just sorta fell into it. Well anyways she lives ~7000 km away from me.





I could go on pages I think background would help in the answers I get but I'm going to cut it down cause no one like reading a block of text.





I've told her I loved her but she is afraid to move on in fair of being hurt again as she had a long distance relationship before that didn't end up all so well. I don't know what to do.


She doesn't say no but she doesn't say yes either. I'm lost in the mist. I don't know whether to make arrangements to learn a new language, to pursue plans.


TBH I'm fine with the way things are right now as I can still talk to her via texting but it hurts to not have an answer and it may sound selfish but I don't know if I'm wasting my time talking to her.





I don't know if I should hold on or let go. And if I let go what will become of me? A rejected love hurts and it is defiantly not easy to fall out of love on your own.





She is 19 and I am 17, I think it is best to wait it out till I pack on some years and till she gets over her past relationship. But I wonder if she will ever try one again. She said she'd prefer not to try again[long dist relationship] and I don't like to make her do things she doesn't want to but this time I don't know if I can handle a no so I've told her more eloquently to ';stop living in the past';. Answer was'; I dunno try again just to be hurt again?';





And can someone tell me what ';=P'; means every time I tell her that I love her?





So my question is what should I say/do? And are there any recommendations on how to make this work. Or should I struggle to just let it go.





Apologies if this was a long read. Thank you for taking the time to read it and any responses are appreciated.





Whether they are experienced or not or whether I should take the advice or not I'll use my own discretion.





So Advice Please!In need of some advice, Online/Long distance Relationship?
=p means shes sticking her tongue out.





LDR are not my thing and so of the 90 percent of peoples in this world either.Just go out with someone that lives like 10 miles from you.In need of some advice, Online/Long distance Relationship?
sound like shes not interested in u but doesnt want to say it. shes tryna let u down gently.


let go of her, itll hurt, but itd hurt more if u held on
Let me tell you, i've been in the exact same position you are in. I was 17 at the time and just graduated high school. I was bored and fooling around at 2am in an international chat room. After getting annoyed with the pervs who want you to watch them masturbate, i was about to just sign off. I started talking to this guy in Europe and now, here we are almost 3 years later. Still haven't seen each other and still have no easy way of saving money to do so.





The ONLY thing you can do is be 100% committed. If she's not willing to be, there's not much you can do about it. Telling her to stop living in the past is a good way to start (although a bit blunt if she's really been hurt); however, she needs to start thinking that for herself. There's a number of things that are probably going through her head right now.





1: Age difference. I'm 19; i KNOW that 2 years has made a difference though i've always been more mature than many people around me. Being 2 years older than the guy (this young) is rarely a good thing because of lack of maturity. Because of this (and other reasons) she may be questioning whether you are serious or not. She might be trying to figure out if you are even ready for something like this. Long distance relationships are harder the further you are apart. In my case, it's on two different continents with an ocean in the way.





2: How likely it is that you'll see each other. I'll be the first to tell you that saving up the money to fund trips to see each other is not easy. If she doesn't believe you're actually working towards seeing her in person, you need to convince her of that.





3: Her past relationships. That's always going to effect future relationships. Give her a reason to trust you and it may get easier for her. It's very easy to cheat and hide things when you can't see each other at all. She may not be convinced that you will be 100% honest with her. I can assure you it's not easy; constant struggle sometimes.





4. The possibility of where you go from there after you've seen each other. Are you going to move to be with her? Is she going to have to do that?





Now that =P she gives when you tell her you love her may mean that she isn't taking you seriously. If you do love her, you need to sit down and talk to her more. Explain to her that you mean it and make her give you a straight answer as to whether or not she loves you. If she doesn't, don't pressure her about it; just let her know all you want is an honest answer out of her. Ask her if she even sees that as a possibility.





So if you're still in high school, don't get super serious about it until you've graduated at least. You need to see where you are going with your life before you try to do a long distance relationship. Too many unprepared people try those and it rarely works. Like one person said, take care of certain things. Get your license if you don't have it already. See what you need to do to get your passport (if she lives in another country and you'd need one to go see her). Get a job if you don't have one already; if you do, start saving money instead of just throwing it away on stuff. If you're going to college, get all of that straightened out and once you're in it, THEN start taking this seriously.
that ';=P'; might mean that she likes it.. but not enough to say it back. saying ';thanks'; to that ';i love you'; is just hurtful to you.





and you shouldn't do anything about this relationship anymore. You don't want to make her to not want a relationship anymore.





I say let it go and if she feels the need to come back to you in the future, then it'll happen. But right now, let her go. it's the best way to approach this situation. if you don't have a job, get one so you can save money to go be with her when you finish high school. adult thinking would help. get your drivers licence if you haevn't gotten it yet so you can drive to go see her.